Sadly, this is not an isolated story. We have heard of children taking their own lives over poor academic performance, failure to attend school trips, disciplinary action, or even being denied privileges at school.
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By Lawrence Mayanja
The tragic death of Sheila Ankunda, a student of St. Thomas Vocational Secondary School in Rutoto Sub-county, Rubirizi District, has sparked deep national concern and intense discussion on social media.
According to preliminary reports, Sheila was allegedly found in possession of a love letter, leading to disciplinary action by a teacher. She was reportedly caned and informed that she would appear before the school’s disciplinary committee. It is further alleged that, distressed by the incident, she returned to the school dormitory, where she was later found dead in what is suspected to have been suicide.
As investigations continue, we should avoid rushing to conclusions. However, the incident raises difficult but necessary questions about parenting, discipline, mental health, and the values we are instilling in our children.
As a parent, I cannot imagine the pain of losing a child in such heartbreaking circumstances.
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Sadly, this is not an isolated story. We have heard of children taking their own lives over poor academic performance, failure to attend school trips, disciplinary action, or even being denied privileges at school. We have also witnessed people taking their lives over sports results or other disappointments that, while painful, should never become matters of life and death.
This should concern every one of us.
The challenge before us is bigger than a single incident. It compels us to examine how we are raising our children.
Discipline has changed significantly over the years. Many of us grew up in homes where strict discipline was common. While some forms of punishment were excessive and should never be justified, they were often accompanied by lessons on responsibility, respect and accountability.
Today, many parents and teachers struggle to strike the right balance. On one hand, children deserve protection from abuse. On the other, they must also learn that actions have consequences. Finding this balance is one of the greatest parenting challenges of our time.
Beyond discipline, we must intentionally nurture resilience in our children. They need to understand that setbacks, correction and disappointment are part of life. We should raise children who can withstand criticism, learn from mistakes and recover from failure.
Parents also have the primary responsibility of shaping values. We should teach our children faith, integrity, humility, respect, responsibility and compassion. Formal education alone cannot build character.
Technology has further transformed childhood. Children today interact freely through social media from a very young age, exposing them to ideas and lifestyles that previous generations encountered much later in life. While technology offers many opportunities, unrestricted access without guidance can also expose children to unhealthy influences.
Parents cannot afford to be passive observers. We must actively supervise our children’s digital lives, know who influences them, and help them distinguish between reality and the unrealistic lifestyles often portrayed online.
Government, through the Ministries responsible for Education and ICT, should also strengthen policies that promote child protection, responsible technology use and moral development in schools.
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Some trends within our education system also deserve reflection. Today, it is not uncommon to see lavish school prom parties, expensive student campaigns, luxury vehicles at school events and displays of wealth that many parents themselves cannot afford. Such environments may unintentionally promote unhealthy competition, materialism and unrealistic expectations among young people.
As a media practitioner, I have investigated cases involving inappropriate relationships between learners and older individuals, including teachers, relatives and mentors. Such incidents remind us that children require guidance, protection and close supervision from both families and institutions.
Another worrying trend is the growing culture of unrealistic expectations. It is increasingly common to find young graduates, still searching for employment, already aspiring to lifestyles far beyond their means. While ambition should be encouraged, it must be grounded in patience, hard work and realistic expectations.
Perhaps the most important question every parent should ask is this:
What kind of child am I raising?
When I was growing up, being summoned to school with one’s parents was a frightening experience. Suspension or expulsion carried serious consequences because opportunities were limited and school discipline was highly valued.
Today, changing social dynamics and increased competition among schools have altered that reality. Some institutions, driven by financial pressures, may prioritize enrolment over thorough background assessments and character development. While many schools continue to uphold high standards, strengthening values-based education remains essential.
Schools cannot replace parents.
The family remains the first school, and parents remain the first teachers.
If we build strong families that nurture discipline, empathy, resilience and moral values, we shall build a stronger generation and a better Uganda.
The loss of any child should not simply become another headline. It should challenge us to reflect, to listen more carefully to our children, and to work together—as parents, schools, religious leaders and government—to create environments where every child feels valued, guided and hopeful about the future.
The writer is a Parent, Human Rights Activist, Media Practitioner and Politician.
Email: lawmayanja@yahoo.com
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